The Pride of Lions

(This is actually about a shroom trip that I witnessed at a friend's. Both dudes were far gone and we discussed. It was one of the most liberating experiences of my life. I felt like I was on shrooms.)

"We are a pride of lions and you are an abandonned cub that I have welcomed as my own.
We're navigators. We are navigators." Leo's mouth overpronounced every syllable.

"What are you saying?!" Jerry yelled at Leo.

I watched them both. He was talking about me. I joined the get together later and I'm the cub. I told them. "I just don't get the navigator thing."

"Whoa, man! You sound like trees!" Jerry pointed at me, laughing. "Fuck that! You are trees! You sound like trees because you are trees! It all makes sense."

I gave in. I replied, "Nah, man. Conversations are trees. They plant roots into all of us, like, the participants, and sprout branches from the conversation into different subjects."

"Whoa, man. Did I tell you, you're my cub? We are a fucking pride of lions." Leo focused on this.

Jerry looked right at me. "Mike, what do you want?"

"I don't know."

Leo stared at me. "You just want to be loved. You don't feel like you are," he repeated. "You just want to be loved."

"Do you know how you want to be loved?" Jerry sat straight up and moved over to the glass table and sat on it. "Do you know?"

I thought for a moment. "There's a lot of distrust in the world," I said. "I don't want inequality in love. I want an equal love in a relationship. I find the thrill to lie in knowing someone. Like hearing stories about their childhood, understanding who they are."

"You just want to be loved," Leo continued.
"We are navigators. That makes so much sense now! Holy shit! Write this down!" Jerry yelled at me.
"You just want to be loved," Leo barked a final time. "You want to know someone's middle name."
"What the fuck does that mean?" I asked.

"People want to love, but we're all passive," Jerry whispered. He stared at his fingers. "It's like Leo and that Jenny girl. Both of them clearly like each other and could possibly amount to love, but they can't find each other. They are navigators and can't find each other. So many branches, man. So many trees."

"You want to know that girl's middle name, dude," Leo told me, "That's it."
"What girl?" I asked him.
"Do you know how you want to be loved?"

Pause

"I want to share stories and be accepted. I want to be there for that person. I want to love in the way the word means it."

"You just want to love man," Jerry this time repeating the words to me.

"You want to know her middle name, man." Leo looked at me.
"You want to know where that middle name came from. You want to know how it's made her who she is."


"I have to go," I announced as I put on my coat.

"Jesus," I thought, on my way out. "So many branches."