It was too long
so I cut it
by half.
But it still seemed blurry around the edges —
metaphors missed the mark
adjectives and adverbs cluttered the images —
like stage light illuminating its subject
not quite sharply enough.
I whittled it down some more
deleted the excess
and the useless
until there were only
a handful of words left.
They weren't quite right
so I crossed them out
one by one
until there remained only
pencil scratches
and traces of erasure
on a blank page.
3 comments:
This is excellent. I especially like the stage light metaphor. You've captured the editing process so well.
"It was too long
so I cut it
by half."
You cut it by half...
Yet the sentence is cut in three.
Clearly something hasn't been thought through here
I just put a line break there because it looked cool. It was not though through.
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